House Envy

When I was a little girl I never thought about getting married. Never. Wasn’t for me. What I did dream of was my own home. A place where I would spend most of my time and love so much I didn’t want to go anywhere else. I grew up in less than fabulous trailers. I can’t complain much because we almost always had a roof over our head, electricity most of the time, and heat in the winter. We didn’t have much on our walls because trailer walls are thin and don’t support heavy wall art well. Growing up like that you would think I would be used to it, not really. I wanted to have a house that I could paint and decorate all my own. Luckily, my husband could really care less for decor so I get to do pretty much whatever I want. 

I was so excited when my husband and I got our first apartment. I couldn’t wait to start decorating. I got a bunch of different decor, some I still have some that has since been gotten rid of. Our apartment wasn’t glamourous but it wasn’t right and cramped either which I love. It also wasn’t square which I really love. Growing up in trailers did give me an appreciation for their flow through layout and I have always been drawn to homes that weren’t in a square. You know when you walk in the front door to the living room then off each wall is a doorway that takes you to the other rooms? I hate that!  Even though we had our own apartment we liked I still wanted more. I wasn’t happy with the kitchen and lack of cabinets. I wasn’t happy with only one bedroom because the living room was cramped. I had house envy. 

We moved into our second home, a trailer with a big corner Jacuzzi tub, a nice back yard, two bedrooms (yes!), and more kitchen cabinets. The downfall of this trailer? Blue carpet and horrid wallpaper that was speckled with blue and pink. It was horrible And we weren’t allowed to paint. I didn’t decorate much in this house because it was so hard to find stuff to match it that also matched my style. It was also here that my house envy grew even worse. It was here I discovered Pinterest. I had at my fingertips all the house decoration ideas I could want. 

It was inspiring for sure. I pinned as fast as I could scroll. Dream house ideas was my biggest board. My house envy into overdrive at these photos of perfectly staged homes with perfectly placed decor and just the right balance of new and old. I began to resent my own home. Never wanted to be there because it was ugly and I couldn’t do anything with it. 

My house envy is on overdrive when I watch fixer upper. I cry like a baby during the reveal because I want that so bad. I so desperately want a home that I love and that I can decorate and make my own.  I love our house we are in now. It has great space, plenty of storage, but it’s a trailer and I can’t hang much on the walls. We are also really tight on money so I can’t buy much. 

I don’t think my house envy will over go away but being able to be home helps some. I just need to get some inspiration for decorating and also get over the fact that I won’t be able to put much on the walls.

What are some of your favorite thrifty home decor ideas? 

Would you like if I shared some of my decorating ideas?


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